As, I hold the wedding card of my parents 27years back! And watching them on screen 26october 1998 I wonder how time has run fast between the autumn of 1998 and autumn of October 2025.

To many it might be just numbers, but for me it's more than that, patience, love, care ,respect , endurance, support and what not. Their marriage is not about materialistic luxuries but about simplicity and mutualism. My mother, the cornerstone of our house whom we call in Kashmiri ,”Braand Kean”, she turned the base of our house so strong she made the non-living object into a living and loving one .My father whom I must call the backbone of our house, a labour who works in formal dress, Medical representative. Who has mingled his blood and sweat, day and night to make our lives so beautiful.
Every civilization is built on families. I must say families are a basic unit of society. Family starts with two people and then when flowers are added into it, it enhances its essence.
As I hear the stories of my mother, from books to baking, her sudden shift somehow in her early 20s put more responsibilities compared to our generation. That time the fear of social life, the stigma deeply rooted and the prejudice, stranger’s daughter, “lukh garich koor” might have put more pressure on her
Despite what I believe was the society and era at that time, she became the mother of three and the utmost responsible wife I must say. On the other hand my father, whom I call a man of infinite efforts and less words. His morning for 28 years has started when the whole Kashmir must have been sleeping and when at dusk the fatigue turned into prayer.
He might not have the official titles but the work he has done for society silently, has sustained his dignity through honesty and hard work. Love of both parents is less poetic but more practical. Through his life, I have learned that masculinity is not about dominance, it is about endurance, humility, and silent strength. He respects my mother not out of obligation but admiration. Together, they prove that equality in marriage is not a Western idea . Marriage is a human truth that existed long before we named it.
As I asked my father what is this bond for you, he replied,” Marriage is a union of two unknown souls written by fate at wheel of life, which are settled in heaven and celebrated on Earth, But beyond that A great marriage is not when 'l' and 'She' became 'We'',but When l and She yet still after 27years Become "We".
Our love is a flame that burns brighter with each passing year.”
And asking the same question to my mother she replied,” when we got married, we were nothing, but being together we are everything now”.
Although my parents don’t stand for the single example of the partnership there are indefinite examples. But how good or bad the bond of parents affects the child and his future is the main reflection.
In Islam the bond of marriage is considered as divine and pious designed to bring love piousness and tranquillity between spouses.
Quran emphasises that Allah created pairs so that together they might found comfort and companionship. So this bond serves multiple purposes like ethical development , family continuity, social stability by encouraging respect and lawful relationships.
Psychology and sciences also emphasises that if bond between parents is good then it plays crucial role in child’s physical, mental and social health. Attachment theory given by Bowlby and Ainsworth shows that responsive and consistent caregiving fosters secure attachment leading to empathy, trust and confidence .
On the other hand, a bad bond between parents has its own harm as social learning theory explains that children imitate hostility or aggression observed at home, increasing defiant or antisocial behaviour.
Moreover, Marital bonds strength is often seen when there is foundation of a healthy relationship. However in societies, the influence of extended families can profoundly shape the couple’s lived experience.
As I have witnessed it. When joined families harbour prejudice, rigid expectations, or unhealed grievances, these tensions often spill into the marital space. As from the individual research I have met more than twenty women who shared the experiences that she is asked to remain silent to preserve “family honor,” suppressing her grievances and carrying the emotional weight alone.
On the other hand, the husband remains stuck among parents, siblings, and spouse whom to support. He is literally being stuck and taunted to whom he must side
This dynamic creates a cyclical tension.
As woman was asked to keep quiet this led her internal stress whole mans divided loyalty creates confusion fosters emotional withdrawal.
So stigmas and prejudices make mountains out of hill from small conflicts to larger disputes
Turning violence into physical or verbal
So breaking this cycle requires conscious boundary-setting and shared understanding between partners. To act as buffers against external pressures there must be open communication and mutual respect. While changing entrenched family attitudes is not so easy, they can create a protected space to address grievances, validate emotions, and make collective decisions. The first step toward preventing its destructive consequences is to recognize the interplay between family prejudice and marital well-being. In societies where honor and stigma dominate, the emotional resilience of the couple becomes both a shield and a silent act of resistance.
As I look toward the future, there comes a pressing question: shall new generations be able to maintain marital bonds?
Shall they be able to tackle the pressures that have long strained relationships?
As pressures are born not of love, but of societal expectations, family prejudice, and rigid traditions
The bond between partners are often seen beyond what they are in truly
The external judgements the unwanted rules
The burdens
Yet, the resilience of a marriage lies not only in the love between two people are they really able to navigate these pressures together. If outdated hierarchies continue to dominate, the delicate fabric of these bonds’ risks being frayed. The challenge for the generations ahead is clear that they have to protect the sanctity of the partnership, they need to communicate openly, to resist the corrosive weight of social prejudice, and to redefine respect and honor in a way that strengthens rather than suppresses. Only then they can endure or as a quiet surrender to tradition, but as a conscious, shared commitment that thrives even amidst societal turbulence
Relationship issues are a leading cause of mental health distress . In India, nearly 50% of youth suicides are related to family disputes, romantic problems, and marriage-related stress. Globally, 27% of women aged 15 and older have experienced intimate partner violence, leading to increased risks of depression, PTSD, and anxiety. In India, family problems account for 34% of suicides, with marriage-related issues contributing 5% .
So family being the basic part of the society
The family is the place where hearts unite in t care and trust and A home becomes a world to share. Here The Love and patience the untouched things build the frame,
Of family and society,
I believe if there are strong bonds at home, its definitely a nation’s pride,
For in its strength, India lies.

Email:-------------------------muskanshafimalik@gmail.com